[ the truth is he just doesn't want her to learn from shen qingqiu.

when that reality catches up to him, followed by remembering that he was just killed by shen qingqiu, he mentally kicks himself. ]

My shizun isn't a very kind man. He used to have me whipped for my mistakes when I was a child... and they were many. [ many of which he didn't even understand what he did wrong ]